特别的一天

原本是昨晚想要写篇文章上载到部落格的，但想想难得今年闰年，二月有二十九日，所以就等到今天才写了。

其实今天也没有什么特别的事发生，就是四年才一次的二月二十九日，这样的特别而已。

今天还有什么事呢？就随兴随想的记录些点点滴滴吧…

农历新年后第一次回公司，主要是开会，也顺便进研究室看了下要升级的电脑的一些讯息资料。

因为帮忙没有时间吃早餐的同事买了面包后的一个小插曲才发现自己还真的是没有去注意同事的穿着的。

同事朋友邀约外出午餐，原本开着的会议也因为有同事跑过来问东西没有真的留意会议内容，所以就干脆放弃会议早点外出午餐。所以今天吃得很从容，没有像平时那样的急促感。

情人老婆仔在我午餐后发了个即使短讯给我，问我是不是会在公司工作一整天？我问她是不是有什么事需要我回家？然后因为之间的情趣都是我一个人在搞而已（自讨没趣…），所以就加了一句问她是不是想我？今天老婆仔破天荒有情趣的回了我“是”，虽然知道她只是应酬骗我一下，但还是突然很有能量的开心了，呵呵！

离开研究室后就马上回家，刚刚好赶上下一个会议，然后就这样又多了些工作，唉～

都不知道敏感什么，回到家后就开始打喷嚏，鼻子眼睛开始痒，也开始流鼻水。真是的，公司太干净，家里太多灰尘？

四年一次的二月二十九日，也就是这样过。没什么特别，也就是一天。

随兴随想 |系列|

My personality (2)

Did the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) test slightly less than four years ago, for a virtual teambuilding.

I was an Advocate (INFJ-A) then, borderline on being intuitive (N) and assertive (A), as oppose to observant (S) and turbulent (T), respectively.

Did another test today, prework for the icebreaker session of an upcoming company event.

This time, I am the Defender (ISFJ-A). Still on the fence for the intuitive versus observant, but skewed towards observant this time. Also still on the fence on being assertive versus turbulent.

Prominently skewed on the other three: introverted (I), feeling (F), and judging (J). So I guess these three are my more distinctive personalities.

The website still has my old test results, which shows I am indeed very consistent on the three indicators and on the fence on the other two.

I still believe I am on the fence for being assertive versus turbulent because while I exibit many of the assertive traits, I am lousy at stress management, which is supposedly a turbulent indicator.

Other |sane side| category entries.

心的频道：没有然后

忘了是何时开始看韩国恋爱综艺节目，看了一出又会发现另一出，就自然而然的也看了。现在看着的是其中一个节目的第三季。

情人老婆仔说是出演者在演戏，我相信或许有些出演者是为了出名，有些为了出演费，但也是有真的情感的。我就是会被这些情感牵动，就当我是缺爱吧…

我就是那种希望世上相爱的人都可以在一起的人，所以看到相爱的情侣最终在一起就非常开心，但看到相爱又因为种种原因无法在一起的情侣时就非常难过。

然后呢？

*****

没有自律，不懂得管理时间，言而无信。答应了没有做到，也不为自己的言行举止负责任。

讲了又讲，重复又重复。仍旧我行我素，没有自我检讨，不思进取，没有改善提升。就是那样日复一日同样的得过且过，敷衍混日子。还会变本加厉。

然后呢？

*****

由衷祈望，携手到老不是因为责任而已，习惯了而已，理所当然的心态。而是相爱到老，真心喜欢相处互动，真的为对方着想，在乎彼此。

讲了又讲，重复又重复，然后呢？

*****

对工作的热忱和动力大大减少了。对没得喘息，连接不断，还常常过分的要求厌倦了。累了。

开始有做不下去的感觉，但又还是需要一个人养家…

所以然后呢？

心的频道 |系列|

有感而发：情感投入

看完了一季韩国二零二三年的恋爱综艺节目，和它的后续。

那位甜美可爱，性格讨喜的女出演者，一个月的节目过程里，即使是多位男出演者们的最爱、被邀约不断，一直都守着第一次约会就令她心动的那位内向男的初心，婉绝了其他男出演者的好意。

偏偏内向男太为其他出演者着想，知道其他男出演者都喜欢那女生，自己又不喜欢复杂错乱的情感和屋内情况（要一起生活一个月嘞），所以压抑自己的情感，令自己煎熬，也让甜美可爱女心酸委屈。

明明互相喜欢，可以在一起的两个人，始终都没有在一起。男的自私一点的话，很多的痛苦煎熬就不会发生了。

结果最后一个两天一夜的外出旅行中，连其他男出演者在知道甜美可爱女对内向男那么重的心意后，都开始为他铺路的情况下，太看别人眼色的内向男始终没有向甜美可爱女提出约会邀请，而是选择了他知道也是向着自己但没有其他男出演者追求的另一位女出演者。

那一天，甜美可爱女终于都心灰了。而已被拒绝过的，唯一一个知道甜美可爱女对内向男的心意后没有为内向男铺路的，那个内向男非常在乎，说是像自己兄弟般的室友，就趁虚而入安抚甜美可爱女，邀她约会…

旅行后过几天就是最终选择了，趁虚而入男就快马加鞭一直和甜美可爱女约会，最后终于得到美人归。

后续那几集，记录出演者在录制节目结束一个月后的情况。全部出演者都关系好好的，当然，那只是录制结束一个月之后，大家还记忆犹新的时段，节目也才刚刚上映。这恋爱综艺节目是去年五月到九月上映的，后续是九月到十月吧？

好奇宝宝网上搜寻了下出演者的近况，看到有文章说趁虚而入男和甜美可爱女去年十月头分手了，那几乎就是节目和后续上映完后的时间点。

唉，我这太过情感投入，希望全部爱情都可以甜甜蜜蜜、情感移入同理心太重的人，只有叹息…

有感而发 |系列|

Break is ending

Took 2.5 days of annual leave, coupled with the 2 days replacement holidays, I got a total of 8.5 days of break for Chinese New Year.

It's coming to an end, resuming work tomorrow.

Absolutely not looking forward to it, but this is life.

It has been peaceful and quiet in the house, after wifey and kids went to the in-laws', and with dad and I being the stay-in-room mind our own business kind of person.

But I am severely hug-deprived. This is very unhealthy for me.

What made it worse is that I am watching a Korean reality show about romance and relationship, and instead of the lovely jubbly sweet sweet feelings that draw me into watching this kind of shows, this particular season is downright saddening.

This is when being an empathic person is not such a good thing, I feel the frustration, the hurt and the pain deeply. I know there can't be happy ending for all the cast members, but there is always one or a few who I am more aligned in values, principles and beliefs, who I would root for, who I hope their love would blossom.

But alas, this season there are too many crisscrossed signals, missed signals, and even false signals. Really hate fake people with their misinformation. So what started as a hopeful sweet relationship got shattered, causing so much pain and hurt to the people involved. And to me, so I guess I am too emotionally involved.

This is when I really need to hug wifey, but she is not here...

So my break is ending, and it seems break is also the ending for the reality show. So sad.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

开工吉日

越老越迷信，这几年都会找一找开工吉日才决定农历新年休假几天，和几时开工。

略懂八字基本知识后就知道这些开工吉日也是看是谁评估出来的，毕竟每个人重视的东西不同，每个人理解和分析都会有差异。

所以我通常会找几份不同的人算出来的开工吉日，校对后才决定跟大多数统一的好日子。

或许有一天，我会开始去理解，然后用自己的八字算出最适合自己的开工吉日吧？

或许吧？但没有确定的完成期，毕竟买了的那几本有关八字的书籍，超过十年了都还没有看完…

话说回来，今天是没有冲我生肖的开工吉日，吉时也是非常合适的时间，我如常的早上八点开工，认真的做了半天工。

对我来说，开工吉日就应该是平时想要的工作日，而不是意思意思开了电脑发个邮件，那绝对不是我理想的工作日。

一早同事朋友即兴开了个一对一的网上会仪，讨论我们一起同做的项目。除了那，今天没有任何的会议，所以我可以有效率的做热流模型。

拿了半天假，毕竟今天真的是为了开工吉日才工作的，我农历新年的休假还没有完，下星期一我才“正式”复工。

开工大吉啦！希望这一年都会顺顺利利的。

心语细述 |系列|

Cave mode on

Wifey and the kids are on their way to the in-laws'.

Visiting the in-laws during Chinese New Year and stay for a few days is something we do annually, but this year I have opted out of celebrating Chinese New Year.

To be honest, I don't really know the exact details of what to do and what not to do, mommi had always been the go to person for our enquiry on culture, custom and tradition stuff, but it's her passing last May that I am observing the no celebrating Chinese New Year now.

Information online regarding this varies, from 100 days to 3 years, and various to do and not to do. I am not sure which to follow, and have decided to stay in and not involve in any merry or celebration stuff for the first 100 days, to opt out of celebrating the first Chinese New Year, and not wearing any merry colours for at least one year.

The last few years before mommi's passing, I had been saturated with the sense of helplessness, seeing her deteriorated and unable to do anything about it... So I shall do whatever I can now.

I don't think losing a parent is something we get over with, or something we will ever forget. It's probably just something we live with as best as we can.

Anyway, if not for pappi being home, it would have been another entry of the home alone series. So not home alone, but definitely entering cave mode.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

Efficiency

Majority of my colleagues working on the same projects, as well as the associated customers, are people who celebrate the upcoming Chinese New Year.

So more and more people started their leave these few days, and many meetings got cancelled.

With meeting-free work day, and less and less instant messages and impromptu phone calls from colleagues, work efficiency has vastly improved.

It's like finally I got the efficiency when I am working overtime at actual work hours, yay!

Finally able to work meaningful duration without interruption at working hours instead of being a meeting engineer.

I am a doer, not a talker.

Less meeting, more doing.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

0.42 days burned

After working too long more than five years with the company, I am getting 20 days of annual leave every year.

So that's 1.67 days added to my leave balance every month.

The leave balance is capped at two times the annual leave amount, so for me the maximum I can have is 40 days.

The 1.67 days is added to the balance on the first day of the month, anything above the maximum limit will be forfeited. In other words, anything in excess of the limit will be irrecoverably lost.

For years I have watched this balance carefully, because to me, these days of paid annual leave are hard-earned through sweat and tears. Paid annual leave is in fact money, anything forfeited is actually a lost of money that could have been paid to us when we leave the company for good.

But I slipped in January, I thought I had at least 1.67 days margin by the end of January, but I didn't. I only had 1.25 days margin, so I lost 0.42 days when the leave balance was updated on 1st of February.

0.42 days burned, so sad. This is simply a waste. Feel so disappointed with myself.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

立春

今天立春，甲辰（木龙）年的开始，祝大家龙年快乐！

今天开始到明年立春前出生的宝宝就是属龙的啦。

丧母后的第一个农历新年，守孝没有庆祝。妻子和孩子们会去娘家，这将是我第一次没有在农历新年去娘家拜年，希望可以理解。

农历新年几天假我应该会看下八字的书，毕竟要准备下才能再次给同事分享。还是觉得怪怪的，分享八字知识这事…

希望甲辰年的到来可以帮我转下最近很糟糕的运啦。我也只能期盼。

命苦，我认。

随兴随想 |系列|

Checked

Last delivery of Chinese New Year cookies and cakes order completed today.

That's another tick off the task list.

Thanks for the orders, friends and colleagues. Hope you enjoy the cookies and cakes.

And wish you all a happy Chinese New Year.

I won't be celebrating Chinese New Year this year, observing the custom of parent passed away within the past year.

Probably not much different given how antisocial I have become, but anyway, I will definitely not be paying anybody a visit during Chinese New Year this year.

It's just something I need to do, regardless of what others think.

Other |sane side| category entries.