07 August 2021

生活没了


周日,就一大堆有的没有的的会议,浪费宝贵的工作时间。

明明就是请我做散热有关的工作,却天天变成会议工程师。

不加时工作,就没有时间工作。加时了,也还是不够时间工作,所以周末又得加班。

今天从早上八点半做到傍晚七点,比正常工作天的时间还要长。但今天是星期六嘞,让我休息的周末嘞…

但也因为是周末,没有会议和其他同事的干扰,所以效率好很多。

尽管如此,这样整天周日要加时、周末要加班的工作状况,真的是会做垮人的。

根本没了生活,何苦工作呢?真的,到底为了什么?

唉…



随兴随想 |系列|


02 August 2021

2nd dose done


Three weeks gone in a blink, today's my appointment date for the second dose of Covid-19 vaccination.

My appointment was actually at 15:00 hours, but as I had late morning meeting as well as back to back meetings the whole afternoon, and since the company hires me to be a meeting engineer, I went for vaccination in the morning instead.

As a responsible meeting engineer, gotta try my best not to skip all those meetings, right? Attending meeting is my job after all, all those thermal stuff are just miscellanea that don't deserve the lion's share of my work time. It's not like I am a thermal engineer.

Ya, my sarcasm meter broke from overloaded a long time ago.

Anyway, found out that going in the morning ended up taking more of my time. Precious meeting time that I can't have enough of.
Pretty sure sarcasm is not a side effect of Covid-19 vaccination, I have always been sarcastic.

My first dose appointment which I attended around 15:00 hours took me slightly less than 30 minutes, today when I went around 09:00 hours it took me about 1 hour. Primarily because there were many more people this time round.

Previously I didn't had to sit and wait from registration to injection, pretty much a smooth walk through these stages, only at the observation stage did I had to sit and wait. Today I had to sit and wait at every stages, the two ladies who jumped queue (shame on you!) didn't helped.

So ya, not an efficiency issue (which I honestly think is good), but simply bigger crowd turning up at the same time. Selfish and inconsiderate people like me who didn't followed his appointed hour (shame on me!), and people who jumped queue (shame on you!).

I am grateful that I am vaccinated, probably need new vaccine now with the many new variants but really, I am thankful for all the effort done by my company and the many volunteers.

Stay safe, everyone, gotta take care of ourselves because no one else will.



Other |hyped up heads up| category entries.


01 August 2021

Liberation


Instead of waking up to work straight away like the past 34 days, today I woke up to not work, and just chill.

Felt strange, and liberating. Strangely liberating.

Besides the weekends, that continuous 34 working days included 2 public holidays and 2 days of annual leave. Yea, took leave, but worked still. So very sad.

I am not a workaholic, far from it, I am a self-proclaimed slacker extraordinaire. Failed miserably these few years. I am truly sorry for myself.

Sense of responsibility is making me feel guilty about not working today, I have to keep reminding myself I should not feel guilty for not working on weekend. I should not have to work on weekend.

The work is never ending, I am just burning myself up not resting when I should be. I have to keep reminding myself that.

The sense of guilt lingers.



Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.


30 July 2021

算了吧!


今天当工作到接近傍晚六点,工作量还是如山没减时,我知道今晚就算加时工作也是做不完的了,周末肯定要加班了。

不是我通常周末只做到午餐的那种加班,这次需要更长的工作时间,而且是都还不一定能够完成那种…

想想这星期一到星期四每天都加班到没有时间运动,反正周末是注定要加长班了,我今天傍晚和晚上就算了吧!

所以我六点出就下班了,然后就去快步走了半个小时。

今晚也不打算工作了,就放纵颓废,做番薯、生蘑菇都不工作就是了。

如果责任感不作祟,周末我也就如常做到午餐就算了,太累了。

总觉得自己已经工作到没有时间生活,这样的人生很没有意思。

真是的,周末加班工作到午餐,已经是“如常”了,唉…



随兴随想 |系列|


27 July 2021

It's only Tuesday


It's only Tuesday, three more days to go before the weekend.

Just two days, and I am already very low in energy level. The long hours overtime these two days didn't help.

Neither was the poor quality sleep.

Even though I probably have to work in the weekend as well, like the many past weekends, but at least I only work the morning half and get the rest of the day to rest. Well, usually. During shittier time I don't even get the half day off...

I know I should be grateful that I still have a job, still alive and well, all that. But at the moment all I can feel is tiredness, and the lack of energy for anything.



Other |wretched workaholic| category entries.


24 July 2021

心的频道:烂泥·朽木


感恩上司的安排,分享和介绍怎么更上一层楼,迈进高官职位的路径和需求条件。

也许那是他工作范围内必须要做的事,我真心感激,但我也全心抗拒。

至少,现阶段的我真的一点也不想要这些。为何他在安排那会议前不先询问我的意愿?

请相信我是没有追求高层次、高职位的欲望的,我真的只要简单的生活。

我工作为了生活,不是生活为了工作,现在的我已经需要常常加班才能完成我的工作量了,真的不需要更高的职位带来的更多的工作量、责任、和烦恼。我已经因为工作少了生活了。

还能够勉强及时交出报告,不是因为我已在舒适圈,而是靠周日和周末的超时工作。去年两百四十三个工作天我加班了一百二十三天,我一点也不舒适!

请不要那么看得起我,就把我当作是扶不上墙的烂泥、是不能够雕的朽木吧。

我要正常工作时间和正常的生活时间,很过分吗?



心的频道 |系列|


21 July 2021


不是“表现;露出”那个显,是马来西亚混杂语那个“郁闷;无聊”那个「显」。

我的显还要再加上不爽和无奈。

又开工了(虽然周末和两天假我还不是在做工…),显。

公司政治,显。

共同合作项目但死死不分享资料的客户,显。

一点都帮不上或根本没有在帮的项目管理,显。

要反社会、反社交的我做新人的伙伴,显。

唉,很显咯!



随兴随想 |系列|