Friends

Our perspective changes as we proceed through different stages in life.

I am happily married and I am way past the stage of life when I was looking for a lady evaluating whether she is a potential partner.

It's all about friendship now. You know, making new friends to have fun together, and all the other things friends do.

Friendship without romance is perfectly natural and normal for me, I don't understand why some people cannot accept that, and insist that there is always something more than friendship between a guy and a lady.

Someone who is still single may see things differently, someone who hasn't settled down in their relationship may see things differently, or someone who is insecure or disloyal in nature may see things differently.

It's okay, different stages in life, and differences in human nature. Everybody has their own believe and characteristics, and I am secure in mine.

I am direct and straight forward, I have little use or patience for those who play lofty or go in circles. When I invite someone to join for lunch, it's simply to have lunch. When I invite someone to join the badminton session, it's simply to play badminton.

If we were to become closer friends, then it would happen through natural progression. I believe the key to any relationship is communication, and it makes perfect sense that with more interaction we can get to know each other better.

The others can make it as complicated as they want. For me, it's very simple and straight forward.

That's me, I am just like that.

Blank

Wanted to post an entry yesterday night, but ended up working on the thesis.

Told myself I really should post something tonight, but my mind drew a blank while I was thinking about something to write.

Didn't want to sort through the photos for a few entries I have in mind that require those photos, e.g. the Koh Samui trip, the making of the most recent LEGO robot.

Too much work. =P

Perhaps just post an interesting photo or image then?

A quick browse through my Pictures folder ended up with plenty screenshots suitable for the Backlogs series, but since I had just posted one a few days ago I decided not to.

Still drawing a blank while I was showering, that's like the last straw because I wanted to work on my thesis after the shower.

So I am writing this as it is, an entry about my struggle to write this entry, the thought process and the blank state of my mind.

生活点滴：我的画展

修改论文期间为了找些旧资料而无意间翻起了好些往事和记忆。

我还真忘了，我曾经有过个画展。

在二零零五年二月中至三月中，香港的一间书店里。

香港，除了那些在机场里红眼漫长的转机等待以外，我没去过。

所以那个画展，我也不在场。

是在大学做研究那几年认识的朋友的母亲办的。

是一个诗刊的推销展览，那期诗刊用了我的照片。

那时还是菲林时代，数码相机才刚刚兴起，又贵又没有现在手机里相机的品质好。

那些照片全是菲林冲洗后再用扫描器数码化的。

那就是我至今唯一的画展。

一个我没去的，我的画展。

生活点滴 |系列|

Backlogs #7

This one is dated 20th of June 2014, titled "praise me".

It's a sad fact of my work life that pretty much every morning in a working day, we become meeting engineers.

Real work doesn't get done until the afternoon, unless, of course, some full time meeting people call for more meetings.

Them full time meeting people really need to know that us engineers are practical and hands on, and that work doesn't get done just by talking about it. Come to the lab or the floor for first hand information and see things get done, pfft!

Anyway I better stop here before this becomes a full blown rant.

I don't know what my praise is worth, but apparently it meant something to someone.

Erm, yea... I have colleagues who are like little kids.

In this series:  |1| |2| |3| |4| |5| |6|

心的频道：造谣者

初稿于二零一五年八月十八日。

造谣者是不在乎事实的，所以也没有必要解释。

要懂得任由他人去讲，他们开心就好，反正我不疼不痒也没差。

当日行一善布施点欢乐给那些无聊的造谣者就好了。

心的频道 |系列|

Released

After two and a half years, I guess it has finally come to an end.

I was asked to either pick up a role that I hadn't a clue of, or to throw my badge, in April two years ago.

To be honest I probably still haven't got much clue of the role after all these years, I just resisted it so much that I only did enough instead of trying to excel.

I did, however, showed them how good the thermal side of a project can be if I handled it. The thermal aspect for all four packages of that particular project, handled by yours truly, and I kicked arse if I say so myself.

But anyway, it has probably come to an end now.

I said probably since after all I have done, right at the very end of the last of the four packages, they phased me out. I am no longer notified or copied.

Guess it's probably time to take credit so I am conveniently forgotten. Only they screwed up when they list me as support for any future issue.

Work politics.

Oh well.

For thirty months, I kept my promise to myself: I will keep my facial hair as my form of silent protest as long as I am still in that role.

I take this as it's over.

I am now so used to having beard and moustache though, probably will take me some time to get used to being clean-shaven again.

Excerpt from Whispers of the Heart

I learned html when I was in university many years ago. To not lose the skill, I created a website coding everything on notepad, and I updated it fairly regularly.

That was before blog became the in thing.

The website was called Sharing Corner, I don't even know if it's still there.

At one time, there was a secret section to Sharing Corner that was not linked from anywhere, and it's password protected.

That section was called Whispers of the Heart, it's my online diary. The whole section was taken offline eventually, and archived. 

When I was going through my archive looking for some research data a few days ago, I stumbled upon it.

This is an excerpt from the entry dated 19th of March 2002.

"You want to be a God don't you? You always want all the friends around you to be happy and smiling, that's impossible you know?"

"I just wish I have some super power, and yes I want all my friends to be ever happy..."

"Why do you have to feel so deeply for your friends? Why are you depressed by others problems?"

"I... I just care... You don't feel depressed seeing your friends troubled by problems?"

"What can you do?"

"I really want to have super power..."

That's me then. I have changed.

I am evil now.

心情杂记

今天（嗯，是昨天了…）心情起起落落。

六点前出门，没七点就到空空的办公室。

几乎每天早上都会变成开会工程师，还要是七点开始就有会议，真是的。

用这么多时间来开会，几时才动手做工啊？用嘴讲工作就会完成的咩？

呈现了我的报告心得后，感觉轻松了点。竟然没有被轰炸，意外小喜。

买了早餐打算回办公室边做边吃，但吴妹妹突然出现身旁说有椰浆饭吃。

看看其它在座都是认识的同事们，我开心应邀。

（不然反社会的我应该是闪人了…）

免费早餐，谢啦！

早餐后便是一贯的和那永远追不上的未阅电邮抗斗。

当然间中必然会有同事闲聊请教求助等等的干扰。

午餐是快乐的。和一班较好的同事朋友为其中一人庆生，大伙吃了一餐好的。

如花，卢花，还有那不在状况的靓妈。

下午接到了同事朋友的即时通讯，告诉了我一个还不想公开的消息。

好复杂的心情。又悲又喜。真的是感伤，但又为朋友高兴。

提早回家，把生日礼物给小瓜，看他眼睛都笑了。晚餐后还拥抱了我一下。

老婆仔见我又是一幅惊吓样，我真的那么恐怖咩？

可不可以看到老公是惊喜而不是惊吓的？   囧

蛋糕、生日歌、吹蜡烛、拍照。

小瓜六岁了。

感慨。

晚间老婆仔揭发大瓜功课簿里是别人的字体，要我明天大瓜醒后处理。

脸黑的老婆仔。

我烂透的心情。

好累。头开始痛了。

没有做到论文，唉…

只想打了针去睡觉，希望可以睡好一晚。

随兴随想 |系列|

心的频道：桥

我有一群较好的同事朋友，工作以外还有互动的那种。

有一起吃午餐的、

有一起玩桌上游戏的、

有一起打羽球的、

有一起玩桌式足球的、

有一起唱歌的、

等等。

其实多数都是同样的一群人里，依据喜好和彼此的关系程度再凑成的，数目少点的小一组人。

一起吃午餐的那几位应该也是感情最好的，共同在许多小组内。

然，午餐那小组人中，也还是有一两位是不一同打球的，一两位是不一起唱歌的啦。

我常常会觉得我在这群人里扮演着桥的角色，连接两岸的桥。

把认识的同事朋友带入其中一个小组中，或把不同小组的同事朋友连接起来，从一组融合进另一组。

就这样，那一群人的总数就慢慢增加，渐渐大家就会熟悉，整群人的朋友圈就变大了。

好事来的，不是吗？

希望不会有过桥抽板，或一把火烧了桥的人啦。

心的频道 |系列|

There's a first for everything

One would have thought that for someone who stays in the hotel room after work, and only goes out for meals, I would have plenty of time to write blog.

I blame the movie channels, and online streaming (hey, gotta watch Running Man =P ).

And my generally tired state I suppose.

My initial plan is to work on one of my short stories. I have brought along the files of all those unfinished stories, but I haven't even bothered to open them.

Just not in the right state of mind I suppose. A tired mind is not conducive to story writing.

Anyway, this entry is handwritten using the pen on my Ultrabook touchscreen in the tablet mode. First time ever, the whole entry, handwritten.

A few more days to go for this business trip, so there may still be hope for the short stories. At least one of them.

Okay, maybe a section. Erm, a paragraph...

Random behaviour for October 2015

Succeeded in my September's impromptu resolution, as shown in the previous entry. feel good +1

Again, I continued the July's resolution as well throughout September, only missed the first day. feel good +1

As for October 2015, starting after I post this, my impromptu resolution is: not to ask wifey about having a daughter.

Because I can asked wifey for ideas and she said so.