Win, but

Did not work overtime this weekend, win!

Did not turn on the laptop at all, so no self-deceiving 'less than 30 minutes so does not count as working overtime' scam.

Would have been a solid win if not for the disabling headache today.

Shortly after lunch, the headache just happened, and became more and more severe gradually, until it forced me to be zombie-like in bed.

Took a shower and some painkillers before dinner, as need to be chauffeur after dinner to pick up brother from the airport. Need to be functional.

The painkillers helped, rendered it akin to background pain instead of crippling pain. Still pain, but functional.

Shame really, would have been a real win if not for the headache. Instead of two days worth of rest and relax, I am ending the weekend nursing a headache.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

Out of time

The fifth season for Diablo IV, named Season of the Infernal Hordes, started in early August.

The thing is, it's a short season, only two months instead of the usual three. It's ending in early October and I am far from completing the season journal.

No thanks to the unhealthy amount of working overtime, and the constant fatigue state that I am in nowadays. Either I am too busy working, or I am too tired to play. Sad.

Anyway, I am playing the Sorcerer for this season, a Chain Lightning build. I am not even at the max character level of 100 yet, and I only have one week left.

One week till season ends and the launch of Diablo IV expansion, the Vessel of Hatred.

I am out of time!

Other |geeky gaming| category entries.

Received!

Received an e-mail yesterday informing me that the plaque for the granted patent has arrived.

Good timing! As I have to be on site today, just nice to pick it up.

Finally, my first patent plaque, yay!

=)

Well, wifey left the plaque in the box it came with and put the box into the glass cabinet, and that's where and how it will most likely remain, until... I don't really know until when. =P

Rather anticlimactic, but that's real life.

Regardless, I got my first patent plaque! =D

Other |hyped up heads up| category entries.

Small win

Ended work on time today, normal working hours, and no overtime.

I know that's supposed to be the norm, but to me it feels like a victory after working so many overtime consecutively.

It brings me joy and happiness, and at the same time, sadness at how twisted I have become, that to feel joy and happiness due to something that's supposed to be the norm.

Just how sad my life has become?

Worked the normal working hours, no overtime. So normal a thing, yet I need to record this.

Nothing to the others, but small win to me. Have to be in my shoes to understand and appreciate.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

送别餐会

昨天星期五，拿了半天假，出席同事朋友的送别餐会。

越老越反社交的我，会做这样的事，主要是为了那些拿了退休配套的同事们。

说了很多次，有些同事就只是同事，但有些同事也是朋友。

那三位拿了退休配套的同事朋友，我是真心要祝贺他们的。终于撑到了荣誉退休的人生里程碑，不简单哦。

而且，绝大多数出席的同事们，是朋友，还是那些在我刚进公司时就认识的人，那些让我那几年不会太难过的同事朋友们。我是懂得感恩的。

真的很开心他们已经达到了那一个人生阶段，绝对是值得祝贺的。

餐馆太吵，所以桌子另一端的对话我根本听不到。或许人数多了点吧？可能是我反社交的缘故，觉得五、六个人的聚会才能有大家都参与的交流对话。

还有就是有只是同事，和同事之上但朋友不到的几位。当然，那是我的问题。

我是庆幸自己参与了那送别餐会的，见一见那些同事朋友们，是难得、珍贵的。

随兴随想 |系列|

失败(2)

答应自己四天长周末里，每天加时工作不超过两个小时，结果每天都超过。

真失败。这是我自己的失败。

今天过了长周末但根本就没有休息到后复工，看到的第一个电邮就是项目目标的改变。

客户要的，和项目领导至今要我们做的，根本是两回事。

失败。这是项目领导的失败。

当然是又要我赶工咯，要在月底跟客户的会议前怎么死都要死出新目标的模拟数据。

真的命好贱。

随兴随想 |系列|

失败

四天半长周末，不出预料的每天都在加时工作。

告诉自己每天要只做一、两个小时就好，就是整理出隔夜跑完的模拟的成绩和有用资讯的那些后续工作，然后把新的模拟设下去跑。

告诉自己每天加时工作不要超过两小时，尊重一下周末和假期是拿来休息的天理。

结果这两天都是做了半天工，唉～

真的是很失败。

自己是失败没错，但队友也应该要为失败负些责任，因为如果他们都有做好他们分内的工作的话，我就不用做这么多额外的工作。

真的很厌倦了是跑在最前面那位。为什么这么多的问题都是由我这散热工程师来发现？明明就是别人的工作，你们怎么都等我发现问题了才来做事？事先就把应该做的做好了才发给团队不可以吗？

这样来消耗我的时间和精力。

因为这些问题，我根本无法每天只是改参数就可以跑新的模拟，而是需要局部重建模型，那是很费时的嘞！

唉… 真的很「显」咯！

随兴随想 |系列|

Long weekend

Next Monday and Tuesday are holidays, I took a half day leave today to make it into a 4.5 days long weekend.

Initially this entry was going with the 'Potato mode on' title, but since I know I will be working a few hours on most, if not all, of these days, I changed it to 'Long weekend' instead.

Potato mode is reserved for when I am truly in a break or holiday mood, and since I am not in that mood, I don't want to smear that term.

Truth is, foremost on my mind is to get the necessary thermal simulation results for the coming Wednesday meeting. Meaning I will be post-processing cases I set to run the day before, then setting new cases to run on a daily basis.

I just hope I can get that done in a couple of hours, and not end up working half day or more.

Could really use some rest, as I have been working without weekend break for several weeks now. I am tired.

So ya, it's a 4.5 days long weekend, I hope I get to enjoy it, or at least to get some proper rest out of it.

Other |hyped up heads up| category entries.

祈祷

好几个周末都在工作，所以连续没有休息日的工作了好久好久好久的感觉。是的，重复三次的那种。

三个项目归纳在一起却只有一位工程师在做散热系统和热流模拟。我不是神，我只能没日没夜的卖命在做。

最后这一个热流模型，希望是这三合一项目的最后一个，不要屁股痒又突然附加多几个，随性归纳成这项目的一部分。根本就是三个不同的项目好不好？

最后这一个热流模型，完成它已经费了我洪荒之力，那只是建完模型而已。开始模拟问题又不断，主要是模型太大了，电脑负担不起，跑模拟跑到死机。

省略简化，把模型改了又改，越改越粗劣，越不精准，只为了减小到电脑可以应付的程度。精确度是我对自己的工作的品质要求，但想到没有模拟成绩，就根本没有品质可言。唉，不喜欢，但无奈。

已经改到第三个版本了，傍晚六点多终于再次启动模拟流程时，我到客厅坐在情人老婆仔身旁，要她放下手机，握着她的双手，请她和我一起祈祷。

宗教信仰意识很弱的我们，一起祈祷这一版的热流模型，可以成功的跑完模拟流程，可以给我模拟成绩。

我不想要每一天，和每个周末都在加时工作了。我真的已经好累好累了。

我只想要好好的、没有压力的睡觉。

这要求，很过分吗？

随兴随想 |系列|

又能怎样？

昨天工作时突然开始头疼。

工作到头疼一点也不陌生，但通常是比较晚的下午才开始。昨天是午餐前就开始了。

从经验知道是会疼到什么都做不了，需要躺平做死尸的那种。

午餐后服了两颗止痛药躺了一阵，没什么差别，只好忍着头疼继续工作。

下班时刻已经是半条死尸的状况，直接在床上做死尸。晚餐也是平时的两、三个小时后才吃，因为一直瘫死到那时间才把自己拖起来。

然后晚上十点半，还是带着头疼的情况下加时工作，做到快凌晨一点钟才下班。

今天早上醒来，头依然在疼。我这健康真的是完蛋了。

但我又能怎样？依旧是开了电脑开始加时工作，一直做到午餐。午餐后继续做到五点左右，不行了又躺平做死尸。

现在晚餐后，写完这篇部落格文章又要继续加时工作了。

劳碌命的我，工还是要做，头疼我又能怎么样？有那孤军作战、独自承受的感觉。

随兴随想 |系列|

有感而发：失败·解脱

二零二四年九月五日。

累，但不再纳闷。

忙了好几周，连续几个周末都在加班，不累才怪。

这星期二晚上，或是星期三凌晨之前那几天，压力大到非常煎熬难受，整个人都不好了的程度。

因为在赶工，一个不可能的任务。只能说，要求的人想得太美，脱离现实的计划。

也怪自己，虽然说了做不到，没有承诺可以在那不实际的期限完成，却又命贱的拼命在赶工。

忙到星期二晚上，星期三凌晨之间的那段时间，终于接受了就算我不睡觉一直工作到星期三那个会议的时间点，也还是不能完成的事实。果然如预料的是无法在星期三交上报告的。

自己终究还是凡人，不是超人，也没有童话故事里或连续剧里的那些奇迹。我问心无愧，毕竟我尽力了。

接受了失败，反而释怀了。其实，不能说是失败，因为真的就是不可能完成的任务。至少对我这个凡人的能力来说啦。

所以星期三的会议里我就理直气壮的说还没有完成，应该是下个星期才会完成吧？没有人挑战我，只是又加了更多热流模拟的要求而已。唉，这些同事…

怎么都好，我是感觉解脱了。是，星期三晚上我依旧加班，今天星期四，我也打算待会再继续做工，但心境不同了，少了那压迫感。

加油吧，自己！

有感而发 |系列|