Long weekend

Public holiday next Monday, took half day leave yesterday (Friday), and taking a full day leave next Tuesday, so I have four and a half days long weekend.

Typically, colleague dropped a parachute request, results needed next Wednesday. Ya, the day I resume work.

So I worked overtime yesterday, and worked till 16:30 hours today. There goes 1.5 days of my 4.5 days long weekend. Bollocks.

The remaining three days will not be relaxing, they will be tiring as well. Yes, I already know.

I will be back to work after the long weekend more tired than before I had the long weekend. And lonelier.

This is life. My life.

Other |hyped up heads up| category entries.

生活点滴：拍拖

今天拿了半天假，和情人老婆仔去看戏、吃晚餐。

我是漫威电影迷，虽然不是所有漫威电影都好看，但 Thunderbolts* 是部好戏。至少对我而言啦。

看完戏和老婆仔去吃日本餐，然后就准备回家了。

在商场内走回停车场的途中路过间运动服装和用品店，老婆仔把我拉进去买双鞋子，毕竟我那双底部已经裂缝，会进水的那种裂缝。

要付款时看见通告说在店内买任何两件货品就打七折，买三件就半价五折！情人老婆仔马上开始寻找合适的运动服装。

偏偏找遍全店都找不到合适的尺寸，或她能够接受的颜色，所以最终变成买了两件运动裤给我。只能承认店的推销伎俩很成功。

驾车回家的路途上问情人老婆仔我们的拍拖怎么样？什么时候最开心？她说是运动店里。

果然女人还是购物最开心…

生活点滴 |系列|

破功

月头加时工作一天后，很特意的不再加时工作，希望这个月就只是那一天。

但这个周末破功了，因为要赶模拟数据，来着的星期需要用到的数据。

星期六和星期天都加时工作，星期六比预期的加时长了很多，以为需要两个小时左右，结果做了四个小时半。星期天就和预期的符合，做了快两小时就完工。

好几年没有获得专利了。不是没有尝试，而是呈交上去的概念方案都没有被批准。坦白说也没有呈交很多啦…

上周突然被一群同事拉进他们准备申请专利的方案里，寻求我的意见。

我还真的是有提供了改变他们想法的意见，从原本当成附加概念变成主要方案，所以我也就快速跑些热流模拟来提供支持数据。

幸好我的想法是对的，现有了的模拟数据对比都呈现散热上的优势。所以我心安理得的觉得我有贡献，而不是坐享其成，就是走好运靠别人吃饭那种。

希望这专利可以被批准啦，好几年白卷了。不贪心，一年有一个就好。

随兴随想 |系列|

心累

坦白说，是喜欢现在的工作性质的，因为可以好好运用我的特长来做有意义、增值的事。

部门也比以前的好，至少在职业规划和前景方面。也有位懂得并且重视我的贡献的经理。

但因为是面对客户，和属于卖命工作态度的团队，常常很忙。没有所谓的工作生活平衡。

其实都还可以，真的。就是不时拿假充一充电，和写抱怨文章上载部落格来缓一缓。

但是，这几年每年不断，有时甚至超过一次的裁减员工行动，那令人心惶惶的忧虑，和留下来的人要扛起离开的人的工作量的压力， 真的是好累人。

心还真的是累了，质疑自己真的需要一直重复这过程吗？是不是，应该就干脆找个安稳的公司，就可以避开这不必要的压力？

心语细述 |系列|

心的频道：为自己加油

忧郁症来袭期间，有些日子还可以，除了无法守住那只有瞬间的快乐，和整天都是低能量的状况以外，几乎和没有忧郁症时差不多。

我不是喜欢交际的人，所以应该也没有什么人可以察觉。当然也没有必要让别人知道，毕竟这是连最亲的家人都不以为然的事。

有些忧郁症期间的日子还可以，但有些日子就特别难过。再努力的让自己处于水面之上，仍是有挣扎失败、沉溺的时候。觉得自己的自律还不错，但就是会有守不住的时候…

伸出去要抓住点什么让自己不溺毙的手，屡次落空或被无情的忽视。是的，只能靠自己。

所以加油吧，我自己！

这是独自的挣扎，自己和自己的战争。

心的频道 |系列|

忌日

对不起。谢谢你。

心语细述 |系列|

Low

Mood: low.

Energy level: low.

Motivation: low.

Quality of sleep: low.

Wellness: low.

Liveliness: low.

Optimism: low.

Other |sane side| category entries.

Solemn thoughts

Vesak Day today, a holiday. Meant three days long weekend. Weekend that included Mother's Day.

*****

Happy Mother's Day, mommi. Can no longer greet you this, but hope you still hear it in heaven.

*****

Heavy is the heart when random people tried to sell me carnation the evening before Mother's Day.

*****

"What kind of man can't take care of his own mother?" in episode 5 of The Penguin series. Painful.

*****

This depression bout is a bad one. Need more love and caring.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.

Pickleball, round 2

Played my second game of pickleball today with colleagues. First game was back in January.

Yes, I still suck at pickleball. =P

But I think I suck less this time so I will take that as positive progress instead of being paired with superior-skilled team mate, hehe.

Just four of us today, and we played in company's basketball court, using tape to mark the pickleball court outline, and with an easy to assemble and disassemble portable pickleball net.

Truth is I am already huffing and puffing during the warm up, but we played two complete matches.

Had a fun exercise, will definitely play again given the chance.

The traffic home though, that was horrible, meh! And I expect to be aching all over tomorrow.

I am very out of shape.

Other |enjoyable events| category entries.

Hello cave

Another depression bout has landed.

I usually don't, but this time I think I may know the triggers, for they had invaded my dreams.

Those last few dreams just before fully awake that I could remember.

Two main themes. The departed, and the trouble one.

Hello cave.

Other |hyped up heads up| category entries.

Indulgence

Last night of four days long weekend, all in all I had it good.

Only did about 1.5 hours of overtime work, and only in one out of the four days. Absolutely did not worked on Labour Day.

That's a win. Okay, a small win, but still a win.

When the idea of this entry popped into my mind, the word that kept popping up is 'splurge'.

But no, I didn't went on a shopping spree or bought anything expensive. I spent Labour Day playing three different computer games and watched some variety shows.

That's simply blissful. So perhaps splurge is not the right word, but definitely a rare indulgence.

Other |temperamental thoughts| category entries.