News Flash!

Wednesday, 29th April, Penang.

Big Donut pinged out of Table Tennis semi final!

Not surprising but for a brief moment there, hope sparkled in Big Donut. Maybe, just maybe, they could make it to the final...

What with?

Sheer dumb luck, of course! =P

Well, and skill where it counts.

Obviously the skill thing doesn't apply to secret weapon no. 9, whose part relies totally on luck. His job was to be the sacrificial lamb, and all that's needed was sheer dumb luck in draw to pair up with opponent's best team.

Big Donut's secret weapon no. 9 has this to say when we caught up with him after the game,

"I am delighted to announce that I have completed my mission. We were indeed pitched against the opponent's best team, which of course, totally annihilated us."

The so called "sacrificial lamb" team from Big Donut didn't get big o'donut for both the matches against their opponent, they managed to get, by sheer dumb luck of course, at least 3 points.

"Woot!" was the response from secret weapon no. 9.

Big Donut wanted to pair their best team against opponent's second best team, and their second best team against the opponent's weakest team so they can get the necessary 2 wins to proceed to the final.

Too bad Big Donut's luck ran out on the draw, they ended up with their best team versus opponent's weakest team and second best against second best.

Captain Horny Lee and his partner 'The Defender' gave all they got, scores were close but the opponent was just a tad better. That's the second best team pairing and losing that deciding game marked the end of Big Donut's journey for the table tennis event.

The best team for Big Donut was their ping pong coach and secret weapon number 1, which won their game saving Big Donut from a whitewash. They didn't face the opponent's weakest team after all, since Big Donut already lost two games and the opponent's weakest team didn't show up, the opponent recycled their players and the audience got to watch a furious game instead!

So, what will happen when the merciless meets the merciful? Who will end up begging for mercy and will any mercy be given at all?

Departmental Olympic Games 2009 table tennis final next week will see the clash of team No Mercy with team The Merciful 9.

Remember to grab the front seat! =)

click here for previous story.

Mushroom and Spiderweb

recent state of the desk of one with strength in thermal modelling

p/s: if you couldn't find me, try the lab.

命名大事

多谢二哥二嫂月头为家里添丁，我现在有了位可爱的侄女。

侄女的到来和太太有喜令我们谈起孩子名字这话题来。

为孩子取名可非儿戏，搞不好会累孩子成为他人的笑柄，有如我无聊的同事们想出来的名字这样。

哪，就是有这些人啦，才会有那些孩子枪杀父母的事件！

=P

吴家家传下来，我孩子这一辈的名，男的是“智”这个字，女的则无须跟从。

太太和我为智翔取名时，我记得我们废除了一些名字，例如：智畅*，智敬，智廉，智伟。

*痔疮的普遍错音

弟弟最近说有孩子时要取单字名，例如：吴聊，吴赖…

我说嘛，男的叫大华，女的叫小花！

Old Fart Grumbling

If those active youngins who were keen enough to turn up for the dodgeball practise today did not have the stamina to play for more than two matches and could not take the heat of the evening sun, I am honestly worried about the dodgeball competition.

Like, whether there would be a competition at all?

Would those not so keen, or the senior citizens, or those made out of wax (quite a handful today, which I was truely surprised), even bothered to turn up for the competition?

Would it simply end up with whichever team that managed to haul six players to the court on time would win by walk over since the opponent didn't turn up?

Geez, mightily fun that would be... not.

I am truely surprised by the lack of stamina of my fellow colleagues, heck, I am not one who exercises, but I could have gone on for a few more matches.

And the evening sun doesn't bother me at all. What's wrong with the youngins nowadays? Children don't go outdoor in the evening to play anymore? Just sat in front of their televisions mashing their PlayStations in an air-conditioned room? Good thing my wife is taking my son out for his daily evening sunshine and exercise.

Or is it because of not wanting to get tanned? Funny how the kuai lou wants to be tan while the Asian wants to be fair, grass is always greener on the other side.

Meh!

Number Two

I have wanted to announce this about a month ago, but a nondisclosure gag by order of my wife had kept my mouth shut.

What to do? I love, respect, and listen to my wife one and don't want my tummy to suffer my own horrible cooking.

But I really like to share the news so I wrote this, an encrypted message for smarty pants to figure out.

Either no one is smart enough bothered, or those who had figured out simply didn't tell me. The former is more likely the case.

If you want to have a go at the encrypted message, go read that entry now before you proceed with this entry.

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Given the two consecutive miscarriages we experienced before we have His Royal Highness King Baby Hsiang, I understand and respect my wife's wish. However, the nondisclosure gag is lifted today after we had the 12th week scan. Hoorah!

The first word of each line in that entry reads:

Mission completion: I'm going to have second kid!!

Yup, my second child is growing in my wife's tummy. =)

always touches me deeply seeing life's miracle

I am thrilled!

There's Something More About Nelson

Remember this entry with the lovely image below?

classic

Well, I realised I haven't been promoting Nelson for a while, which is not good, since it's one of the few things I promised to do in 2009, kind of like resolution...

Similar to the previous entry, it goes without saying that I am only sharing what Nelson has done or said and not something made up. Just presenting facts so you know Nelson better and draw your own conclusion.

A picture says a thousand words, so here goes...

sleeping beauty catching up on his beauty sleep

All photos courtesy of Polly.

Polly took his time and leisure taking these photos from different angles and zoom range since Nelson was blissfully in la la land at that time and was oblivious to what's happening around him. Sweet dream.

One wonders what Nelson does at night leading to such an exhausted state? Or could it be the stress of his job, i.e. chatting online and surfing Facebook? Surely it cannot be because of his secondary job of tooling design, right? Or was it just a heavy lunch? Hmm...

All his lunch buddies know he is ever so busy on instant messaging (his primary job after all), having to wait for him to send his numerous "ttyl" (talk to you later) whenever asking him to leave his seat for lunch, a process that takes at least ten minutes and upwards of thirty, imagine the number of chat windows he has active!

the slacker extraordinaire wasn't happy being caught working when his neighbour was slacking

So here you go, something more about Nancy/Nelson.

Thunder!

Much like a sponge soaking up water, my son, ops... His Royal Highness King Baby Hsiang (my bad, please don't behead me, Your Royal Highness) is happily learning new words nowadays.

It was raining cats and dogs a few nights ago, I was in the lounge with His Royal Highness King Baby Hsiang when a lightning flashed through the sky followed by a tremendous thunder.

His Royal Highness King Baby Hsiang was scared by the loud boom and ran to me, saying "怕怕" (scared).

I held him close and in a reassuring voice told him it's alright.

"It's just a thunder, broom broom."

"Under, broom broom."

"Yea, THUNder, broom broom."

"Thunder, broom broom."

"That's right, thunder. Good boy."

He learned the word thunder that night.

Fast forward a few days, I came home and my wife told me a funny incident.

Apparently His Royal Highness King Baby Hsiang overheard a family member breaking a rather big wind, farted quite loudly that is.

"Thunder!" He said after hearing that.

Don't you just love them innocent babies? =D

the force is strong in this one (it will knock you out!)

News Flash!

Tuesday, 7th of April, Penang.

Big Donut munched in Foosball semi final!

Big Donut, the self-proclaimed black horse team of the eight teams participating in the Departmental Olympic Games had their rainbow-coloured bubble burst by team Explode today.

Well, no surprise there really when Big Donut's speciality is to own-goal (that's the entry requirement to join the team).

The first match started with the secret weapon no.9 of Big Donut (everyone is a secret weapon in Big Donut), basically the lousiest player in the team, scoring a signature own-goal. That idiot was mightily pleased with himself.

"Heh, at least that's a goal!" Said the striker from the dreaming team of Big Donut.

Team Explode, feeling bored, gave the opponent an Easter-came-early present in the form of an own-goal! Big Donut felt immensely close to Explode after that generous act, one could almost feel the love in the air.

"I like you already. Welcome to the club!"

After high-five was exchanged, Explode decided to show their true power and quickily brought the match to a 5:1 end. Remember, the 1 for Big Donut was the Easter present. =)

The second match ended in record time, with Explode beating the crap out of the dreaming team with a magnificent 5:0. Thus ending the first game.

Big Donut sent their dream dream team for the second game, the pairing of AKK and OPS! (AKK = aam kong king, OPS = oh peh soot)

Explode won the first match of this second game. The foosball table had turned 20 degree after this match since AKK jarring power was veli the geng!

AKK, team captain of Big Donut, showed his AK power to the fullest in the second match. Synergised with OPS prowess, this resulted in an unbelievable Big Donut win of 5:0!

Yea, I pinched myself too, but it really wasn't a dream.

Team Explode, getting their 'wind' back in the third match, brought everyone back down to earth and kicked Big Donut out of the Foosball event.

Thus ended the black horse team progression.

That wasn't the end of the competition though.

Having fun is the motto of Big Donut, and sportsman-and-woman-ship was abundant in both the competing teams so the third game was on despite the then guaranteed final position for Explode.

The third game turned out to be the most exciting game of all. Big Donut sent their dream team (inside source confirmed this is the real one), up against another strong pair from Explode.

The skill of both teams was almost equally matched, giving the floor a fantastic game. Cheers, taunts, gasps, shouts, jeers, squeals, and most importantly, laughters aplenty. There were even impromptu commentators broadcasting live in English, Malay and Tamil!

The game ended with the one and only Big Donut win for their Foosball semi final.

For Big Donut, getting to semi final in Foosball is already a great achievement and since all involved had fun, it's mission accomplished! =)

Marital Status

I have wanted to write this for a while now, but somehow it kept slipping my mind. So I guess I better just write it now that I still remember. =)

You know, when you found that "special one" and started the courtship and seeing each other frequently, basically that's when the relationship upgrades to "more than friend", or more commonly known as boyfriend/girlfriend.

So, "more than friend": boyfriend/girlfriend. Legal status: single.

The next level up comes when the relationship has matured and both parties have decided that yea, this is really "the one" and yes, I want to spend the rest of my life with this person.

In order for the relationship to upgrade to this next level, the guy has to go through the, to me, dreadful act of proposal.

Besides the fear of being rejected, proposal is made tough by all the stupid Hollywood movies with thier grand and expensive ways of proposal. You know, the fairer of the species may have seen just such a movie and set that as their baseline of comparison, dammit.

Since I have already been through that, I want to make sure all other guys suffer too. So ladies, please make your man propose to you, else don't marry him. =P

Proposal usually comes with the engagement ring, the guy will present the engagement ring to the lady and if the lady accepts the proposal, she would take the ring and put it on her ring finger (left hand or right hand depends on culture and sometimes religion). This signifies that the lady is engaged, the status thus changes to fiance for the guy, and fiancee for the lady.

Engagement ring is the one with a "rock", most commonly diamond, but can be other gem or precious stone. Only the lady gets an engagement ring, the guy gets to break his wallet buying the ring THEN to think of how to perform the dreadful proposal.

Engagement is not legally binding, it can be called off without any legal procedure. So guys, make sure you really found "the one" and not just someone who wants to run away with the diamond ring. =P

So, engaged: fiance/fiancee, fiancee gets an engagement ring. Legal status: single.

The next level is of course, getting married.

Getting married is actually quite simple, I am going to cover what is applicable in Malaysia. The engaged couples go to the government body that deals with marriage and put up their photos, this announces to everyone, well, to those busy bodies that actually go check who is getting married, that they are getting married.

The photos will be up for a period of time (of course in Boleh-Land this period can be omitted by paying money), if there is no objection from anyone, then the couples can sign the papers in the presence of witnesses and the government personal. Two witnesses and the government personal sign those papers too and basically that's it, you are married.

This signing of papers is of course, legally binding. Meaning you are legally married after signing those papers, not after you have your grand wedding ceremony on a later date which you planned to invite the whole village.

In fact, you do not even need to have a wedding ceremony at all if you choose so.

A lot of people, either ignorance or simply misinformed, thought that signing of the papers signifies engagement, and only after the wedding ceremony are they considered married. Nope, one is legally married after signing the papers, and it's illegal to put your marital status as single after that.

Wedding bands are exchanged after a couples get married. A wedding band is traditionally just a plain ring (hence a band), but nowadays some wedding bands also contain precious stone.

Again the wedding band is worn on the ring finger, left hand for me but in some countries/cultures/religions, it's on the right. The bride can choose to wear both the engagement ring plus the wedding band on the same ring finger, or seperate them to left and right ring fingers, or to just wear the wedding band.

So, married: husband/wife, both exchanged wedding band. Legal status: married.

Of course there are many whom actually know they are legally married after signing the papers but haven't had their wedding ceremony, they just prefer to mislead the others into thinking they are still single, wanting the attention they associate with being single.

Naughty naughty, and disrespectful of the other half.

Cover Mountain Cover Sea

I am hired as a thermal engineer because I am hot.

I soon realised I am more like a meeting engineer.

Oh well, I can still be cool do the cool stuff like getting involve in planning and executing fun teambuilding events.

However, lately I have to do the integrator job, running after colleagues way more senior than me bugging them to do their job. Me no likey.

Then shit fell from the sky and hit me straight in the face when Mr Empty-bucket-who-talks-and-on-leave-a-lot started treating me as if I am his underling and dumped his work onto me. Me no likey, me angry, me mad.

And recently, I am starting to be treated as a module engineer. Learning new skill set while helping out is one thing, taking over and doing other person job is quite another thing.

I signed up as a sizzling hot and irresistibly cool thermal engineer, okay? Not integrator, not module engineer, not peon to Empty Bucket*.

And let's not forget that ultimately, I am sizzling hot and irresistibly cool the slacker extraordinaire.


* as in "empty buckets make the most noise"

H.A.F.D.

I have thought long and hard on this subject matter and decided that, what the heck, I am going to share this bit of news that I have kept secret for slightly more than a year now.

All great things started somewhere.

It might have started out as something small, something insignificant, something out of boredom, or something just for jest, but lady luck could change it to something big, something fantastic, something great.

Through sheer dumb luck, I had a brush with just that.

And this is the story.

I am not sure how many of you are aware of or still remember that I used to post a story called Harly Potter and the Heart-shaped Stone? (check the fictitious fiction category!)

The whole thing started in November 2007, when I was in transit Changi Airport to The States. I was bored, so I started scribbling.

Obviously it's just me trying to be funny with J.K.Rowling fantastic Harry Potter series. It was meant to be a jest, nothing serious, just passing time, you know.

However, I kind of got a kick out of writing the story so I became slightly serious about the whole thing. Had the storyline planned out, think of the funny names and events, that sort of things.

Will you believe me if I told you that publishers randomly surfed the net for blogs to read with the intention of hunting for potential author?

No?

Well, I didn't believe that either, until I was contacted by just such a publisher, that is.

It happened in February 2008, a few days after I posted the 6th entry. I received an e-mail from Google, saying a publishing company was requesting for the e-mail address I use to sign into blogspot. Google respects privacy so they didn't disclose my e-mail address to the company without my permission.

I gave my permission to Google, mightily intrigued and a bit excited by all that really. Two days later I received an e-mail from the publishing company saying they want me to write for them.

They like the Harly Potter story and want me to write something similar, but I have to change the name to avoid intellectual property infringement. And they want me to get rid of all those Manglish stuff and write with proper English.

Oh. My. Goodness!!!!

There are a lot more to that but I am not going to put everything down here. It's nothing big they say, just a small book to begin with to test the market reaction.

Still, my own book! Oh boy oh boy oh boy!

I cannot announce the publisher for the time being for legal purposes, but I can tell you it's a company based in the United Kingdom. After I got past my initial excitement I thought it probably was a prank so I searched the web for the company and found identical contact details as given in the e-mail, I called the company to check.

Just to be absolutely sure I wasn't dreaming I asked my UK friends to go verify and yes, there really is such a company and they really have me on their talent hunt list, whatever that is.

I never did explain why I suddenly stopped writing the Harly Potter story, now you know.

I guess I owe those who were following the story an apology. I cannot continue to post on the blog since I would be breaking my contract with the publisher if I did so. I sold out, sorry.

If you are really interested, go buy the book when it's out! =)

Long story short, my book will be around 250 pages long (last edit was 247), it has a few more stages to go before the marketing stage. I was told the initial batch will just be 100 copies and sold only in UK. I will get a copy, of course. =)

Oh, H.A.F.D. is the abbreviation of the book title, the current title anyway since it's still not set in stone but probably 80% sure it will be this one.

Want to take a guess at the current title?

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Happy April Fool's Day!

=P

If you believed this you would believe anything! =D